I'm a person with very vibrant emotions. I dream very vivid dreams with color and feeling. Last night I dreamed a few dreams...one of which was of me sitting in the back seat of a car with two men (neither of them I recognize now that I'm awake, but knew in my dream) and one of them kept poking me, hard, in the ribs and it tickled me. It was so hard in fact that I woke up with a start, thinking someone was poking me. No one was.
That dream really has nothing to do with this post. Except for the fact that when I think, dream, or feel something, I do it with lots of passion, emotion, color...nothing bland, dull, or passive.
This is exhausting. Seriously, exhausting. When I'm sad, I'm really sad. When I'm happy, I'm really happy. When I'm excited, I'm really excited. When I'm disappointed, I'm really disappointed. You get the picture.
Friendships...wow. When I get a friend I put my whole heart into it. I've figured out lately that this isn't the best idea. Boundaries. Setting healthy boundaries is important. Now, of course, it's good to open your heart to people. It shows the real you, helps create long lasting friendships, shows the person you're trustworthy (usually). But when you give someone your whole heart and soul, leaving nothing for yourself...you kind of lose yourself. You forget who you are. At least, I do. I've decided I need to learn how to moderate my feelings. It's okay to be passionate, to love fully, to open up. But I need to set healthy boundaries.
I'm tired of thinking so much. Tired of obsessing so much. Tired of having such STRONG strong emotions. I mean, emotions are good. I just don't want them to consume me anymore. I want to be physical. I want to do. I don't want my thoughts and obsessions to get in the way of my actions. I need to just GO and DO. A wise prophet talked about that...so it must be important. Here's to going and doing. I'm tired of being in my head so much.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Room to create
I love when I get an idea and I can just run with it. It happens when I give myself time and space to create. When I'm just not thinking about anything else. It happened yesterday. It was a good feeling. This idea can be credited to a couple recent conversations, but specifically to one I had with Sister Fuhriman, the wife of my former mission president. Love her. It's so good to be able to call her up nearly two years after my mission (one of a couple phone calls in the past two years) and say, "I'm calling you because I need to talk to someone much older, wiser and more experienced than myself." Here's the rough but finished product.
Please excuse the fact that I look...less than decent. I went swimming tonight and never re-did my hair or makeup. :) Enjoy the nice piece of hair sticking straight up.
Fly
Sometimes I like to walk in bare feet
To let my skin feel the grassy sweet
But sometimes the sharpness of the rocks
Directs my path into a dead-end block
I need to learn how to fly
I've gotta just break free
From the ground underneath me
The thorns and rocks, well hidden they lie
I need to just jump up and get ready to fly
I need to learn how to fly
Feel the air carry me
And just let it all be
See life through the eyes of a child
Need to just enjoy the ride
I need to learn how to fly
Why do I try to control
Every little piece of my soul
It keeps on trying to escape my grasp
Of fear that's choking and holding it back
I need to learn how to fly
I can't keep draggin' myself down
Meanwhile dragging everyone else around
Let the Spirit fill my heart
And let everything else do its part
Feel the air carry me
And just let it all be
See life through the eyes of a child
Need to just enjoy the ride
Please excuse the fact that I look...less than decent. I went swimming tonight and never re-did my hair or makeup. :) Enjoy the nice piece of hair sticking straight up.
Fly
Sometimes I like to walk in bare feet
To let my skin feel the grassy sweet
But sometimes the sharpness of the rocks
Directs my path into a dead-end block
I need to learn how to fly
I've gotta just break free
From the ground underneath me
The thorns and rocks, well hidden they lie
I need to just jump up and get ready to fly
I need to learn how to fly
Feel the air carry me
And just let it all be
See life through the eyes of a child
Need to just enjoy the ride
I need to learn how to fly
Why do I try to control
Every little piece of my soul
It keeps on trying to escape my grasp
Of fear that's choking and holding it back
I need to learn how to fly
I can't keep draggin' myself down
Meanwhile dragging everyone else around
Let the Spirit fill my heart
And let everything else do its part
Feel the air carry me
And just let it all be
See life through the eyes of a child
Need to just enjoy the ride
Friday, May 7, 2010
The THREE zone
Friends, I need sleep. Sleep is good. We all should get enough sleep. Last night was the second night this week I got less than 4 hours of sleep. I like to call it the THREE zone.
There was only one night this week that I got 7 hours. And, those hours were split up between my bed and the couch...loud noises that consistently take place in my room disrupt my sleeping nearly every night.
Reasons why we need sleep:
1) God tells us we should
2) We'll die if we don't
3) It feels good
4) Dreaming is fun
5) To escape from reality for a few hours
6) Your eyes will start to burn if you don't
7) Your head will start to pound if you don't
8) You'll become extremely emotional if you don't
9) You'll become really cranky if you don't
10) You'll start laughing at everything...and by everything I mean everything
11) You'll stop making sense...you words will slur and you'll forget what day it is
12) Basically, your brain will float away and you'll find yourself in a strait jacket
So, let's all get a good amount of sleep, shall we?
There was only one night this week that I got 7 hours. And, those hours were split up between my bed and the couch...loud noises that consistently take place in my room disrupt my sleeping nearly every night.
Reasons why we need sleep:
1) God tells us we should
2) We'll die if we don't
3) It feels good
4) Dreaming is fun
5) To escape from reality for a few hours
6) Your eyes will start to burn if you don't
7) Your head will start to pound if you don't
8) You'll become extremely emotional if you don't
9) You'll become really cranky if you don't
10) You'll start laughing at everything...and by everything I mean everything
11) You'll stop making sense...you words will slur and you'll forget what day it is
12) Basically, your brain will float away and you'll find yourself in a strait jacket
So, let's all get a good amount of sleep, shall we?
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Homesickness covers more than just home...
The things I'm homesick for....
We'll start with my home, since "home" is in "homesick."
This goes along with home...the Oregon Coast.
This goes with home too...trees and green.
My mom and my sister...
My studly brother...
For another fun video of Kev...see if this link will work.
Sundy Lynn...
We'll start with my home, since "home" is in "homesick."
This goes along with home...the Oregon Coast.
This goes with home too...trees and green.
My mom and my sister...
My studly brother...
For another fun video of Kev...see if this link will work.
Sundy Lynn...
The rest of the Peterson clan...I have no pics with the beautiful Happiness in them. :(
Lacey! I miss Lacey.
Aunt Nancy!
Paul's on a mission in Japan right now. :)
The Mississippi Jackson Mission...SOOO homesick for this one.
I'm only going to post a few video clips...I love every part of my mission though and every companion.
Rita...Sister Jensen...or now Tanja Dalton. :)
Tuakoi!!! I think Wiechmann's in one or two of these too. :)
My newest brother...Bobby! I WISH I had a video of this guy...he's hilarious. :)
My old roommie, Rebecca Joy Falke Somers. :) LOVE her.
I'm homesick for my dad...
Baby me
Baby Kayleen
Baby Kevin
Childhood friends. :)
From left to right, Hailey, Lisa and Ashleigh. Hai and Lisa were prego in this picture. :) Hailey and Lisa each have a boy and a girl, and Ashleigh has two girls and another on the way. :)
And...my heavenly home. But luckily there are remedies for that one. :)
The end. Long post. Sorry. It's what's in my mind lately...and in my heart. Depending on who you are, I'm sure you'll pick and chose the videos you watch. :)
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
People
I just love people. I love connecting with individuals. I love understanding them. I love watching people. I wonder what makes all these strangers tick. What they're going through. What experiences have helped shape them into the types of people they are today. I love people. We, as people, are too critical of people. Too judgmental. Too harsh. I'm guilty of it. I don't want to be. We're all just trying to make it in this world. I love that. An Amy Grant Song says, "In a little while we'll be with the Father, can't you see Him smile. In a little while we'll be home forever. In a while. We're just here to learn to love Him. We'll be home in just a little while." We're just here to learn to love Him...and by loving Him we'll love everyone around us. That's key. It's not, "How can I get mine...how can I get what I need," but "What will make God happy? How can I help these people get back to Him as well?" I need to work on that. But I love people.
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
I've been tagged
by my mission sister and step-mom, Rita. (Yes, we're a scandalous family.)
Four Shows I Watch:
1. Life Unexpected
2. Gilmore Girls
3. Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman
4. Judging Amy
Four Things I'm Passionate About:
1. Creativity
2. Writing
3. Music
4. Family/Faith (I know, I cheated)
Four Phrases I Say A Lot:
1. "Tender."
2. "Good times."
3. "Sad about it."-thanks to Sundy Lynn
4. "Why come?"
Four Things I've Learned from the Past:
1. Understand your motives for everything.
2. Seek to understand people's feelings.
3. Rely on God.
4. Don't stop reading the scriptures.
Four Places I Would Like to Go:
1. New York
2. Back to my mission in the South
3. Back to my home in Frankfurt, Germany
4. Connecticut
Four Things I Did Yesterday:
1. Woke up later than 4 a.m.
2. Whipped out my last writing assignment for Advanced Writing in 20 minutes.
3. Poured my heart out to a friend.
4. Listened to Amy Grant's new CD.
Four Things I'm Looking Forward to:
1. The end of the semester
2. The end of this week
3. Seeing my family
4. Soaking in the beauty of GREEN Portland
Four Things I Love about Winter:
1. Hot chocolate
2. FIRE
3. Family time...around the holidays
4. Getting warm under a blanket after being out in the cold
Four Things on My Wish List:
1. Singing a duet with Amy Grant :)
2. Having a career that will ultimately help people
3. Finding out what it's like to sit in a pair of pants that don't cut off my circulation... :) Ok...exaggeration. But you get my drift.
4. Getting some of my songs on the radio
Four People I tag:
Kayleener
Sundy or T.-Or both combined...yeah, do that
Eva-Yes Eva, I'm tagging you. If you don't do it...then we're not friends anymore.
Monica-You haven't updated your blog in a while...I want to hear from you. :)
Four Shows I Watch:
1. Life Unexpected
2. Gilmore Girls
3. Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman
4. Judging Amy
Four Things I'm Passionate About:
1. Creativity
2. Writing
3. Music
4. Family/Faith (I know, I cheated)
Four Phrases I Say A Lot:
1. "Tender."
2. "Good times."
3. "Sad about it."-thanks to Sundy Lynn
4. "Why come?"
Four Things I've Learned from the Past:
1. Understand your motives for everything.
2. Seek to understand people's feelings.
3. Rely on God.
4. Don't stop reading the scriptures.
Four Places I Would Like to Go:
1. New York
2. Back to my mission in the South
3. Back to my home in Frankfurt, Germany
4. Connecticut
Four Things I Did Yesterday:
1. Woke up later than 4 a.m.
2. Whipped out my last writing assignment for Advanced Writing in 20 minutes.
3. Poured my heart out to a friend.
4. Listened to Amy Grant's new CD.
Four Things I'm Looking Forward to:
1. The end of the semester
2. The end of this week
3. Seeing my family
4. Soaking in the beauty of GREEN Portland
Four Things I Love about Winter:
1. Hot chocolate
2. FIRE
3. Family time...around the holidays
4. Getting warm under a blanket after being out in the cold
Four Things on My Wish List:
1. Singing a duet with Amy Grant :)
2. Having a career that will ultimately help people
3. Finding out what it's like to sit in a pair of pants that don't cut off my circulation... :) Ok...exaggeration. But you get my drift.
4. Getting some of my songs on the radio
Four People I tag:
Kayleener
Sundy or T.-Or both combined...yeah, do that
Eva-Yes Eva, I'm tagging you. If you don't do it...then we're not friends anymore.
Monica-You haven't updated your blog in a while...I want to hear from you. :)
Friday, March 26, 2010
Exhausted
I've come to the realization that my days of being well-rested are over. Does well-rested need to be hyphenated? Anyway...
College is time consuming. I'm always tired. It's Friday night...and I'm in the basement of the Spori (my second home). It's the lovely communication building, and the basement is where all the video/voice production takes place. Do you know how long Final Cut takes? Editing video takes FOREVER and a day. Forget editing, just transferring the files from the camera to Final Cut takes 10 years. So, it's 11:00 p.m. and I really haven't been home today.
I'm shooting my final video for my Multimedia video journalism class this weekend. It's focused on competitive jumprope and they're having a competition tomorrow. I had to drive to somewhere far away this evening to catch the team in their practice. I only interviewed 3 participants...hopefully that's enough. But I also interviewed the coach and hopefully tomorrow I'll get some parents. If I do a great job on this news package, there's a possibility I can get it aired on channel 8 news. That would be so great for my resume.
Ok. I'm tired. And I'm bored. Guess what...college means tired. That's the definition for it. I bet you didn't know that. Ok, I'm seriously tired. So, I'll stop typing.
College is time consuming. I'm always tired. It's Friday night...and I'm in the basement of the Spori (my second home). It's the lovely communication building, and the basement is where all the video/voice production takes place. Do you know how long Final Cut takes? Editing video takes FOREVER and a day. Forget editing, just transferring the files from the camera to Final Cut takes 10 years. So, it's 11:00 p.m. and I really haven't been home today.
I'm shooting my final video for my Multimedia video journalism class this weekend. It's focused on competitive jumprope and they're having a competition tomorrow. I had to drive to somewhere far away this evening to catch the team in their practice. I only interviewed 3 participants...hopefully that's enough. But I also interviewed the coach and hopefully tomorrow I'll get some parents. If I do a great job on this news package, there's a possibility I can get it aired on channel 8 news. That would be so great for my resume.
Ok. I'm tired. And I'm bored. Guess what...college means tired. That's the definition for it. I bet you didn't know that. Ok, I'm seriously tired. So, I'll stop typing.
