I just might drop everything and move to Tennessee to chase after my singing dream.
Seriously, people.
And, no...a question mark does not belong after "guess what." It's a command, not a question. :)
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Sunday, July 10, 2011
Heavy heart
My heart is heavy at the moment.
Reason: Judgement and ridicule from limited minded people...and the impact those judgements can have on people's lives, faith and testimony.
Why, when we hear something "different" or that doesn't meet OUR approval about someone, we automatically start jumping to conclusions, want to talk about it...and spread our opinions, thoughts, and misunderstandings to any ear that wants to hear? Gossip. Slander. Rumors. Misinterpreted or misrepresented facts. I'm struggling with all of this.
I'm not exempting myself from this. I gossip with the rest of them. My natural man likes to jump in and talk, question, express my opinion about the lives of others. But today...it has become overwhelmingly unbearable for me.
Christ still has compassion on those who make, what we deem as, unforgivable mistakes and has compassion for the families and friends of those who make such mistakes. My heart aches for such people and families right now. So much so that I could not stop crying throughout Sacrament meeting today in church.
I wish, sooo very much, that the natural man could overcome judgement. I wish I could overcome judgement. It is so harsh and cruel. We can never know what goes on in another person's mind and heart. We can never understand the reasoning behind people's choices, actions, thoughts and feelings, because we are not that person. Only Christ and God know exactly what that person is feeling and thinking. Only They have the responsibility, maturity, and perfected hearts and minds to make those judgements.
Righteous judgement, as we often justify our act of judging with, does not include gossip, scornful looks and behind-the-back ridicule.
I'm tired. I'm tired of the natural man. I'm tired of my natural man. I'm tired of the constant battle I have with my worldly desires and nature. And I'm deeply saddened by the thought that my worldly mistakes, such as judgement and gossip, could cause others to question their testimonies and lead them down a wrong path. I know that people have a choice. They can choose to stay active in church regardless of rumors, gossip, or offense. They can choose to keep their testimonies strong. But it's extremely difficult. And I still have an obligation and duty to live in a way that will only help people stay strong in their testimonies...not make them question their testimonies.
I want to be more Christ-like. I want to lead people to Him. I hope and pray that I can continue to line my life with His Gospel. It's not just about the big things. It's easy for many of us to not kill, not commit adultery, not steal...to even not harm our bodies with substance abuse. Sometimes it's more about the small things. I hope to overcome the "small" things.
Reason: Judgement and ridicule from limited minded people...and the impact those judgements can have on people's lives, faith and testimony.
Why, when we hear something "different" or that doesn't meet OUR approval about someone, we automatically start jumping to conclusions, want to talk about it...and spread our opinions, thoughts, and misunderstandings to any ear that wants to hear? Gossip. Slander. Rumors. Misinterpreted or misrepresented facts. I'm struggling with all of this.
I'm not exempting myself from this. I gossip with the rest of them. My natural man likes to jump in and talk, question, express my opinion about the lives of others. But today...it has become overwhelmingly unbearable for me.
Christ still has compassion on those who make, what we deem as, unforgivable mistakes and has compassion for the families and friends of those who make such mistakes. My heart aches for such people and families right now. So much so that I could not stop crying throughout Sacrament meeting today in church.
I wish, sooo very much, that the natural man could overcome judgement. I wish I could overcome judgement. It is so harsh and cruel. We can never know what goes on in another person's mind and heart. We can never understand the reasoning behind people's choices, actions, thoughts and feelings, because we are not that person. Only Christ and God know exactly what that person is feeling and thinking. Only They have the responsibility, maturity, and perfected hearts and minds to make those judgements.
Righteous judgement, as we often justify our act of judging with, does not include gossip, scornful looks and behind-the-back ridicule.
I'm tired. I'm tired of the natural man. I'm tired of my natural man. I'm tired of the constant battle I have with my worldly desires and nature. And I'm deeply saddened by the thought that my worldly mistakes, such as judgement and gossip, could cause others to question their testimonies and lead them down a wrong path. I know that people have a choice. They can choose to stay active in church regardless of rumors, gossip, or offense. They can choose to keep their testimonies strong. But it's extremely difficult. And I still have an obligation and duty to live in a way that will only help people stay strong in their testimonies...not make them question their testimonies.
I want to be more Christ-like. I want to lead people to Him. I hope and pray that I can continue to line my life with His Gospel. It's not just about the big things. It's easy for many of us to not kill, not commit adultery, not steal...to even not harm our bodies with substance abuse. Sometimes it's more about the small things. I hope to overcome the "small" things.
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Deep Deep Trouble
Allow me to invite you into my past.
As I've stated before, many times, my dad died when I was young. So, I grip onto memories and things that remind me of him very tightly.
This is one thing that makes me think of him. The Simpsons. I don't watch the Simpsons. I've probably seen 3 episodes in my entire life. It's just never drawn me in like other shows often do. The CD "The Simpsons Sing the Blues" does draw me in, however. My dad introduced this then-tape to my sister and me when we were just teeny little children. We LOVED it, and so did he. I now have a CD, but the tape we had back then was played many many times. In fact, when I was about 5 years old, I thought it would be fun to put it into my little recorder and record over it, on this specific song, just to show how good I was at memorizing songs. So, part of the way through "Deep Deep Trouble" Bart cuts out, and I start singing. It's great. Then, Kayleen and I start singing a New Kids On The Block song. Then one of my parents finds us, I say "Oh no!" and the tape goes back to Bart to finish off the song. It's seriously a great treasure.
But anyway, here's the song. A song that lunges me back in time. Back when I was 5 and my dad was alive.
If the song offends you...take it up with my dad in the next life. :)
As I've stated before, many times, my dad died when I was young. So, I grip onto memories and things that remind me of him very tightly.
This is one thing that makes me think of him. The Simpsons. I don't watch the Simpsons. I've probably seen 3 episodes in my entire life. It's just never drawn me in like other shows often do. The CD "The Simpsons Sing the Blues" does draw me in, however. My dad introduced this then-tape to my sister and me when we were just teeny little children. We LOVED it, and so did he. I now have a CD, but the tape we had back then was played many many times. In fact, when I was about 5 years old, I thought it would be fun to put it into my little recorder and record over it, on this specific song, just to show how good I was at memorizing songs. So, part of the way through "Deep Deep Trouble" Bart cuts out, and I start singing. It's great. Then, Kayleen and I start singing a New Kids On The Block song. Then one of my parents finds us, I say "Oh no!" and the tape goes back to Bart to finish off the song. It's seriously a great treasure.
But anyway, here's the song. A song that lunges me back in time. Back when I was 5 and my dad was alive.
If the song offends you...take it up with my dad in the next life. :)
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