I've had this song streaming through my ears on repeat for the last two weeks. Haven't gotten sick of it yet. Call me dramatic, but it speaks to me.
Thursday, December 4, 2014
Tuesday, November 25, 2014
Never mind...
There's a fine line between good, raw, real pure heart-breaking writing...and self indulgent, woe-is-me, pitiful writing. My last post felt closer to the latter. So I removed it. Not before a couple people read it, but soon enough.
Instead of leaving it posted, I reached out to my cousin for a listening ear. The post was about loneliness. This was my cousin's response.
"That's when the Savior's life was the hardest, when He felt alone. When His Father removed His Comforter. Being and feeling alone is the worst feeling in all of humanity, even for Christ."
That quote is why I love Sundy Lynn. She has an empathetic heart. And she draws from the Spirit when comforting. This was the absolute best thing I could have heard/read while I was in the depths of loneliness. She reminded me that the Savior knows EXACTLY how I feel, and He recognizes the excruciating pain loneliness can bring at times.
So, instead of posting about my grief and sorrows, I want to post about my gratitude. Gratitude for the Savior and His Atoning sacrifice. His healing hand. His understanding heart. His forever guidance. His constant companionship. I love Him.
Gratitude for the people God puts in my path. For a roommate who calls to check up on me, listens to me cry, and then says, "Crys, I hope you're prepared to stay up until 1:00 a.m. because there's a movie we HAVE to watch right now. It will make you feel better." And it does.
For a bishop who cares. Who takes the time to know YOU. To text you on your birthday, and pull you aside in the hall to tell you he's thankful you're in the ward.
For good friends. Smart friends. To be surrounded by compassionate, intelligent people. For friends who live on the floor above mine, and I can just take my work laptop up there with me, plop on their couch and watch a movie while working, with people who care.
For a family who loves me. A mom who understands me. And when she doesn't, she works really hard to see things from my perspective. For a brother, sister and brother-in-law I feel close to. Where memories run deep for all of us. A step-family I couldn't imagine my life without. Older siblings who act excited to see me. Nieces and nephews who love me and want to be around me.
A good, solid job. Coworkers who lift me up instead of tear me down.
A cute, cozy, safe two-bedroom apartment. A beautiful city. Cheaper public transportation. A car that works.
Life is good. Hard at times. But definitely good. And I have much to be thankful for.
Happy Thanksgiving.
Instead of leaving it posted, I reached out to my cousin for a listening ear. The post was about loneliness. This was my cousin's response.
"That's when the Savior's life was the hardest, when He felt alone. When His Father removed His Comforter. Being and feeling alone is the worst feeling in all of humanity, even for Christ."
That quote is why I love Sundy Lynn. She has an empathetic heart. And she draws from the Spirit when comforting. This was the absolute best thing I could have heard/read while I was in the depths of loneliness. She reminded me that the Savior knows EXACTLY how I feel, and He recognizes the excruciating pain loneliness can bring at times.
So, instead of posting about my grief and sorrows, I want to post about my gratitude. Gratitude for the Savior and His Atoning sacrifice. His healing hand. His understanding heart. His forever guidance. His constant companionship. I love Him.
Gratitude for the people God puts in my path. For a roommate who calls to check up on me, listens to me cry, and then says, "Crys, I hope you're prepared to stay up until 1:00 a.m. because there's a movie we HAVE to watch right now. It will make you feel better." And it does.
For a bishop who cares. Who takes the time to know YOU. To text you on your birthday, and pull you aside in the hall to tell you he's thankful you're in the ward.
For good friends. Smart friends. To be surrounded by compassionate, intelligent people. For friends who live on the floor above mine, and I can just take my work laptop up there with me, plop on their couch and watch a movie while working, with people who care.
For a family who loves me. A mom who understands me. And when she doesn't, she works really hard to see things from my perspective. For a brother, sister and brother-in-law I feel close to. Where memories run deep for all of us. A step-family I couldn't imagine my life without. Older siblings who act excited to see me. Nieces and nephews who love me and want to be around me.
A good, solid job. Coworkers who lift me up instead of tear me down.
A cute, cozy, safe two-bedroom apartment. A beautiful city. Cheaper public transportation. A car that works.
Life is good. Hard at times. But definitely good. And I have much to be thankful for.
Happy Thanksgiving.
Thursday, November 13, 2014
Dear Seattle...Thank you.
I passed my two-year mark of living in Seattle about a month ago. Sometimes I feel like, aside from my mission, moving to Seattle was the best decision I've ever made in my life. This is where I've "grown up" and learned to love myself. I've been presented with fabulous work and career-growth opportunities. My Seattle friends are some of the best people around...incredibly intelligent, wise, well-rounded, warm, accepting and kind. And the vibe of Seattle fits my personality so well. It's a hard-working city, but easy going. A driven city, but not extremely competitive. I belong here.
In contrast to the decision to serve an 18-month mission for my church, I did not pray much about the move. I just felt in my heart and soul that it was THE choice to make. I knew before even uttering a prayer, which is honestly how the Spirit often moves me. Some people thought I was crazy to leave Georgetown and a Communication job in D.C. in order to move to Seattle without a job lined up and no friends at all. But nope. I'm so grateful for the agency God gives us, along with the choices and opportunities to take giant leaps of faith. And God has been with me every step of the way. So I thank God, and I thank Seattle. I'm happier and more fulfilled than I have been in a looong time.
Saturday, October 11, 2014
Meet the strong, single, career-driven female Mormon
Where was that in the movie?
Okay okay, "Meet the Mormons" was a great movie. It really was. It inspired me on many levels, and kind of left me with a feeling of admiration for people of all faiths and cultures, honestly. Obviously every Latter-day Saint story can't be represented in a 78-minute documentary. But they did clearly stay away from the more controversial lifestyles that do exist within the church. I'll skip discussing some obvious controversial Mormon lifestyles, and I'll just stick to the category I find myself in at the moment.
While watching that movie I sadly couldn't help but feel a little left out of the club. Again, I will say that the movie was beautifully made, well-rounded culturally wise, inspirational and did move me to tears. But the honest truth is, I felt a little left out...and walked away with a "wanting" feeling. This church is focused on families. That movie was focused on families. Sure, a what-seemed-to-be strong female career woman opened and closed the film, but we don't know her background...and her story was not told.
I'm truthfully not trying to be controversial. Again, I realize every Latter-day Saint's story cannot be portrayed. But these are my feelings and thoughts...this is my blog...so, I'm sharing.
I have spent the better part of the last two years doing ALL in my power to follow the counsel of the brethren and find an eternal companion. It's not like I haven't tried in years past, but I have been very actively putting my time and energy into fulfilling one of the biggest, if not THE biggest commandments ever given. Go to church...it's centered on marriage and family. Go to the temple...it's centered on marriage and family. I'm ready to fit in, eternally progress, and start experiencing my God-given divine role as a wife and mother. Not to mention, I'm ready to have companionship in this lonely, cold, tiring world in which we've been placed.
Since moving to Seattle I have physically dated two non-Mormon men and three Mormon men. I have conversed with at length, through online dating, at least four or more Mormon men. I have attended game nights, parties, FHEs and whatever other awful YSA social gatherings you can think of. And still, here I am, the strong, capable, very single, career-focused Latter-day Saint woman writing this blog post.
This last year brought high hopes. It started off with me meeting an LDS man online, hitting it off very well through emails and phone conversation...and then weeks of dating semi-long distance (we lived 3 hours apart). Needless to say, it didn't work out. We wanted it to, but it just didn't fit...and believe me, you can't force something that doesn't fit. And I swear if I hear "Any two worthy LDS people can make a marriage work" one more time, I'm going to take a fork and jam it in my ear. Easy for you to say when you found the love of your life at age 18 or 21. While we're on the topic of jamming forks in our ears...please don't let me hear the words "Gosh, live it up while you can. You're only single once" come out of your mouth. That, too, is VERY easy to say when you only had a couple short years to wonder if you'd spend the rest of your life alone. Anyway...
Then I dated a man who I really started to see possibility with... We dated for a few months, but due to reasons I don't feel at liberty to discuss in this forum, the relationship ended...pretty recently.
I am single. Not for lack of trying. Not for lack of wanting. Not for lack of faith. But because it is the plan God has for me right now in this time of my life. And I'm doing my very best to keep it together, to enjoy life, to progress, to remain selfless, and to find the proper balance of not obsessing over something that I clearly cannot control but taking the proper action steps of faith to show God my desires.
So, here I sit, pondering the movie I just saw. Loving it for the truth it brought...but wishing I was represented. I've lived my life decently righteously. I've dotted my I's and crossed my T's. And not necessarily to gain anything. I live the Gospel because I believe it, I love it, I feel it. But sometimes I do wish that I fit in better. I wish I had a more firm place. I wish my voice was heard a bit more. Not just as a single woman who believes and has faith one day she'll get married and have children...but the voice of a single woman who knows she may never get married and have children, but still finds belonging, still finds purpose, still finds love and still finds acceptance. I know it's there, but open, public support is sure nice to receive sometimes.
So there's that for honesty. I love this Gospel and I love this church. And I only hope that we can all continue to reach out beyond our own personal little bubbles and appreciate the unique strengths we all can bring to the church table.
Okay okay, "Meet the Mormons" was a great movie. It really was. It inspired me on many levels, and kind of left me with a feeling of admiration for people of all faiths and cultures, honestly. Obviously every Latter-day Saint story can't be represented in a 78-minute documentary. But they did clearly stay away from the more controversial lifestyles that do exist within the church. I'll skip discussing some obvious controversial Mormon lifestyles, and I'll just stick to the category I find myself in at the moment.
While watching that movie I sadly couldn't help but feel a little left out of the club. Again, I will say that the movie was beautifully made, well-rounded culturally wise, inspirational and did move me to tears. But the honest truth is, I felt a little left out...and walked away with a "wanting" feeling. This church is focused on families. That movie was focused on families. Sure, a what-seemed-to-be strong female career woman opened and closed the film, but we don't know her background...and her story was not told.
I'm truthfully not trying to be controversial. Again, I realize every Latter-day Saint's story cannot be portrayed. But these are my feelings and thoughts...this is my blog...so, I'm sharing.
I have spent the better part of the last two years doing ALL in my power to follow the counsel of the brethren and find an eternal companion. It's not like I haven't tried in years past, but I have been very actively putting my time and energy into fulfilling one of the biggest, if not THE biggest commandments ever given. Go to church...it's centered on marriage and family. Go to the temple...it's centered on marriage and family. I'm ready to fit in, eternally progress, and start experiencing my God-given divine role as a wife and mother. Not to mention, I'm ready to have companionship in this lonely, cold, tiring world in which we've been placed.
Since moving to Seattle I have physically dated two non-Mormon men and three Mormon men. I have conversed with at length, through online dating, at least four or more Mormon men. I have attended game nights, parties, FHEs and whatever other awful YSA social gatherings you can think of. And still, here I am, the strong, capable, very single, career-focused Latter-day Saint woman writing this blog post.
This last year brought high hopes. It started off with me meeting an LDS man online, hitting it off very well through emails and phone conversation...and then weeks of dating semi-long distance (we lived 3 hours apart). Needless to say, it didn't work out. We wanted it to, but it just didn't fit...and believe me, you can't force something that doesn't fit. And I swear if I hear "Any two worthy LDS people can make a marriage work" one more time, I'm going to take a fork and jam it in my ear. Easy for you to say when you found the love of your life at age 18 or 21. While we're on the topic of jamming forks in our ears...please don't let me hear the words "Gosh, live it up while you can. You're only single once" come out of your mouth. That, too, is VERY easy to say when you only had a couple short years to wonder if you'd spend the rest of your life alone. Anyway...
Then I dated a man who I really started to see possibility with... We dated for a few months, but due to reasons I don't feel at liberty to discuss in this forum, the relationship ended...pretty recently.
I am single. Not for lack of trying. Not for lack of wanting. Not for lack of faith. But because it is the plan God has for me right now in this time of my life. And I'm doing my very best to keep it together, to enjoy life, to progress, to remain selfless, and to find the proper balance of not obsessing over something that I clearly cannot control but taking the proper action steps of faith to show God my desires.
So, here I sit, pondering the movie I just saw. Loving it for the truth it brought...but wishing I was represented. I've lived my life decently righteously. I've dotted my I's and crossed my T's. And not necessarily to gain anything. I live the Gospel because I believe it, I love it, I feel it. But sometimes I do wish that I fit in better. I wish I had a more firm place. I wish my voice was heard a bit more. Not just as a single woman who believes and has faith one day she'll get married and have children...but the voice of a single woman who knows she may never get married and have children, but still finds belonging, still finds purpose, still finds love and still finds acceptance. I know it's there, but open, public support is sure nice to receive sometimes.
So there's that for honesty. I love this Gospel and I love this church. And I only hope that we can all continue to reach out beyond our own personal little bubbles and appreciate the unique strengths we all can bring to the church table.
Tuesday, September 9, 2014
A New Set of Problems
I'm not naive. I realize a new life would only bring new problems. But I'm ready for a change of pace. Different problems.
I have so much to think about right now. Do I want to continue on down the HR career path? Or do I want to make a drastic change? Apply for Teach for America? Go to Grad School for Social Work or Counseling? Decisions decisions. It ultimately comes down to A) Do I want to make lots of money in a job I don't care much about? Or B) Make little to no money in a job that would make me feel alive?
I've been kinda, sorta, maybe seeing someone for the past few months. That, in and of itself, is a complicated mess. Maybe not the relationship itself, but my feelings, emotions, insecurities, and indecisiveness. Things are progressing reaaaallllyyyy slowly. Partly my doing, partly his. I'm not ready to share much about my relationship with him, because there are a lot of variables involved...that typically are not present when you commit to a relationship in your early 20s. I am in my 30th year of life. Dating means something different...and often comes with more decisions than when you're 20. Maybe you're picking up what I'm putting down. Or maybe I'm being too vague. I'm not sure what I'd prefer. Anyway...my brain is overwhelmed.
This summer had brought so much hardship. Close family friend died suddenly, drowned in a reservoir. Heart-wrenching, to say the least. I've been homeless for the last month. No fun. Couch surfing...no consistency. I threw my back out about a month ago, still not healed. My car was broken into and expensive valuables were stolen from my trunk. I don't feel like explaining why they were in my trunk...but it was a fluke occurrence. I'm tired. Emotionally. Physically. Mentally.
I'm ready for a new life. A new direction. A new path. Can someone spin me really hard and see which way I point?
I have so much to think about right now. Do I want to continue on down the HR career path? Or do I want to make a drastic change? Apply for Teach for America? Go to Grad School for Social Work or Counseling? Decisions decisions. It ultimately comes down to A) Do I want to make lots of money in a job I don't care much about? Or B) Make little to no money in a job that would make me feel alive?
I've been kinda, sorta, maybe seeing someone for the past few months. That, in and of itself, is a complicated mess. Maybe not the relationship itself, but my feelings, emotions, insecurities, and indecisiveness. Things are progressing reaaaallllyyyy slowly. Partly my doing, partly his. I'm not ready to share much about my relationship with him, because there are a lot of variables involved...that typically are not present when you commit to a relationship in your early 20s. I am in my 30th year of life. Dating means something different...and often comes with more decisions than when you're 20. Maybe you're picking up what I'm putting down. Or maybe I'm being too vague. I'm not sure what I'd prefer. Anyway...my brain is overwhelmed.
This summer had brought so much hardship. Close family friend died suddenly, drowned in a reservoir. Heart-wrenching, to say the least. I've been homeless for the last month. No fun. Couch surfing...no consistency. I threw my back out about a month ago, still not healed. My car was broken into and expensive valuables were stolen from my trunk. I don't feel like explaining why they were in my trunk...but it was a fluke occurrence. I'm tired. Emotionally. Physically. Mentally.
I'm ready for a new life. A new direction. A new path. Can someone spin me really hard and see which way I point?
Thursday, July 31, 2014
What if...
I never fall in love?
I'm starting to feel incapable of falling in love.
How's that for your negative Thursday musings?
I'm starting to feel incapable of falling in love.
How's that for your negative Thursday musings?
Friday, June 27, 2014
Find What You Are Looking For
Probably my all-time favorite song.
Not that you care, but recent public events surrounding my church have caused me to, once again in my life, reach out, try to understand, and try to bridge the gaps between myself and those with whom I don't necessarily agree. There may be law and there may be a right and wrong, but everyone is given different paths in life...and come to conclusions in different ways and on different time tables. I honestly, truthfully cannot KNOW who I would be or what choices I would make, or how long it would take me to come to certain conclusions had I been given a different pair of shoes. I thank God for the shoes I was given, and I hope to spend my time in these shoes actively bridging gaps instead of passively passing judgment on people who wear different shoes than I.
Not that you care, but recent public events surrounding my church have caused me to, once again in my life, reach out, try to understand, and try to bridge the gaps between myself and those with whom I don't necessarily agree. There may be law and there may be a right and wrong, but everyone is given different paths in life...and come to conclusions in different ways and on different time tables. I honestly, truthfully cannot KNOW who I would be or what choices I would make, or how long it would take me to come to certain conclusions had I been given a different pair of shoes. I thank God for the shoes I was given, and I hope to spend my time in these shoes actively bridging gaps instead of passively passing judgment on people who wear different shoes than I.
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
The Biggest Loser
I'm writing from the bus again.
Well, it's finally happened. I finally no longer feel the need to publish every thought in my head. Because I've gotten rid of Facebook, I've had more time to think, ponder, strengthen relationships with people physically present in my life (because I share my thoughts with them and we can have a legit conversation about it) and I read so much more! I thought I'd just blog more with the lack of Facebook, but blogging takes time...and time is so hard to come by these days.
I worked a 10.5 - day today with no lunch break. My 10-day vacation in New Zealand can't come soon enough. And oh wait, I leave this Saturday!!! Sheri (the friend with whom I'm going) has been sending me a count down for the last couple weeks. We're like 3 days away, people! Cray-zay! I just finished shopping at the downtown Target...where I bought a new backpack and travel stuff. I'm excited. :)
I've been doing online dating. Just like blogging...I tend to avoid it because it takes time and brain power. But I don't regret the choice to do it. I'm talking full-blown, paid-for LDS online dating. If anything, it's at least helping me realize I'm not totally repulsive to decent Mormon men. I was starting to wonder.... I dated last year...but the two men I dated were not Mormon.
I hate the show The Biggest Loser. HATE it. I've tried watching it before and it makes me feel sick...literally sick to my stomach. And uncomfortable. And depressed. And sad. Human beings are put on display in front of millions of people (akin to zoo animals), tortured and forced to do crazy things (akin to circus animals) and we call it inspiring. They are real people with real lives. The show is unhealthy, unrealistic, and irresponsible. I've always hated the show, because it's basically treating human beings like lab rats, and causes weight biases. But I definitely hate the show now after the controversy of the last winner. We call her too fat...and then we call her too skinny. Who are we anyway? No matter what the size of the contestant, those tactics are unhealthy and will never last long term. America wants everything fast and magical. It's ridiculous to think you can fix a problem with the same problem (ie. fast food and pre-packaged crap with over training and obsessively counting calories...replacing fast with fast...magic with magic). These things take time. The brain needs time to catch up to the physicality of it all...or THEY WILL FAIL and revert...or go too far the opposite direction.
End rant.
Life is good. Hope y'all's lives are good too. :)
Well, it's finally happened. I finally no longer feel the need to publish every thought in my head. Because I've gotten rid of Facebook, I've had more time to think, ponder, strengthen relationships with people physically present in my life (because I share my thoughts with them and we can have a legit conversation about it) and I read so much more! I thought I'd just blog more with the lack of Facebook, but blogging takes time...and time is so hard to come by these days.
I worked a 10.5 - day today with no lunch break. My 10-day vacation in New Zealand can't come soon enough. And oh wait, I leave this Saturday!!! Sheri (the friend with whom I'm going) has been sending me a count down for the last couple weeks. We're like 3 days away, people! Cray-zay! I just finished shopping at the downtown Target...where I bought a new backpack and travel stuff. I'm excited. :)
I've been doing online dating. Just like blogging...I tend to avoid it because it takes time and brain power. But I don't regret the choice to do it. I'm talking full-blown, paid-for LDS online dating. If anything, it's at least helping me realize I'm not totally repulsive to decent Mormon men. I was starting to wonder.... I dated last year...but the two men I dated were not Mormon.
I hate the show The Biggest Loser. HATE it. I've tried watching it before and it makes me feel sick...literally sick to my stomach. And uncomfortable. And depressed. And sad. Human beings are put on display in front of millions of people (akin to zoo animals), tortured and forced to do crazy things (akin to circus animals) and we call it inspiring. They are real people with real lives. The show is unhealthy, unrealistic, and irresponsible. I've always hated the show, because it's basically treating human beings like lab rats, and causes weight biases. But I definitely hate the show now after the controversy of the last winner. We call her too fat...and then we call her too skinny. Who are we anyway? No matter what the size of the contestant, those tactics are unhealthy and will never last long term. America wants everything fast and magical. It's ridiculous to think you can fix a problem with the same problem (ie. fast food and pre-packaged crap with over training and obsessively counting calories...replacing fast with fast...magic with magic). These things take time. The brain needs time to catch up to the physicality of it all...or THEY WILL FAIL and revert...or go too far the opposite direction.
End rant.
Life is good. Hope y'all's lives are good too. :)
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
Nashville
So, I got into the show "Nashville" last year. It's in its second season. The musical talent on that show is unbelievable. Seriously. Just look up Lennon and Maisy Stella (they're sisters) on YouTube. Or Sam Palladio and Clare Bowen singing "Fade Into You." My word...talent. I love that this show creates and produces its own music, and that all the stars sing all their own songs.
Anyway....
This song was on an episode two weeks ago...and I'm obsessed. I can't wait until I can get a clean version (without the dramatic scenes and talking in between). :) Love it.
Anyway....
This song was on an episode two weeks ago...and I'm obsessed. I can't wait until I can get a clean version (without the dramatic scenes and talking in between). :) Love it.
Sunday, February 2, 2014
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
The latest haps, brought to you from route 77
I never want to take the time to blog when I'm at home. By the time I work my overtime, hit the gym and bus home...all I want to do is cook my dinner, watch some YouTube clips and hit the sack. Or chat with the roommies. Or do some random church activity, which seem to be filling all my evenings lately.
So, I'm blogging on the bus.
We're about a month into the year. I'm making progress on ny desires. I'm not sure I can remember them all off the top of my head. But, I've remained deactivated from Facebook...and oh, how sweet it feels. We're getting closer to NZ. I've tried to call someone I love every week. I was finally called to schedule an interview with Big Brothers Big Sisters...so I'm hoping that works out, which would be a 12-month commitment, not just 4 months like my goal. I'm backup for a Ragnar team if anyone drops out. Switched which half I plan to run, haven't signed up yet though. I finished a biography and am on my second. I've attended the temple this month. Is that 8? I think those are all my desires for 2014, and I'm doing well...one day at a time. :) I guess they're not all my desires...but the majority of the ones I can control. :)
Life has had its ups and downs this month...as always. I've been reminded that no matter how hard I try to make a make-shift family, nothing will be as stable as finding an eternal companion and starting my own. However, I'm still very thankful for all the wonderful people God continually puts in my life.
And...that's it for this morning. From bus route 77 into downtown Seattle, this is Crystal Noel, signing off. :) Happy day, everyone.
So, I'm blogging on the bus.
We're about a month into the year. I'm making progress on ny desires. I'm not sure I can remember them all off the top of my head. But, I've remained deactivated from Facebook...and oh, how sweet it feels. We're getting closer to NZ. I've tried to call someone I love every week. I was finally called to schedule an interview with Big Brothers Big Sisters...so I'm hoping that works out, which would be a 12-month commitment, not just 4 months like my goal. I'm backup for a Ragnar team if anyone drops out. Switched which half I plan to run, haven't signed up yet though. I finished a biography and am on my second. I've attended the temple this month. Is that 8? I think those are all my desires for 2014, and I'm doing well...one day at a time. :) I guess they're not all my desires...but the majority of the ones I can control. :)
Life has had its ups and downs this month...as always. I've been reminded that no matter how hard I try to make a make-shift family, nothing will be as stable as finding an eternal companion and starting my own. However, I'm still very thankful for all the wonderful people God continually puts in my life.
And...that's it for this morning. From bus route 77 into downtown Seattle, this is Crystal Noel, signing off. :) Happy day, everyone.
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
No more Facebook...bring on 2014!
Well friends, I took the plunge. I've deactivated my Facebook account, and I'm not sure when I'll be back. Maybe in a couple weeks. Maybe in a month. Maybe in a year. Probably a month.... :)
Something about it was making me tired. It's overwhelming. I'm tired of viewing things everyone wants everyone to see. I'm also tired of the fact that I truly believe it's ruining sincere communication. I feel like people don't call me/answer my calls because they already know what's going on in my life through Facebook.... It's much easier to hide behind a screen and say mean and/or nice things to people. I'm just tired of the half-hearted, passive way of giving people approval or rejection. And...I'm also tired of texting being people's main form of communication. I'm guilty of it. But I'm tired of it.
So, quitting Facebook for a little while leads me into.....
2014 DESIRES
1) To run a half marathon
2) To stay off Facebook for at least a month
3) To call someone I love once a week (and not just the same person every week)
4) To travel outside of the country (not a 'walk across the boarder' type of thing)
5) To attend the temple monthly
6) To ***POSSIBLY*** run Ragnar (something akin to "Hood to Coast" for those of you familiar with that)
7) To read 5 biographies/creative nonfiction books
8) To find a nonprofit at which I can volunteer and stick with it consistently for at least 4 months out of the year
I think all these desires are worthy of becoming reality.
1--I've already got picked out. I haven't signed up yet, because I've been subjecting myself to staying on a very tight budget due to a forthcoming trip I'm taking, but I will sign up in the next month or two.
2--I've started the Facebook one. Maybe I'll knock this one out this first month of the year. :)
3--I'm hoping this one won't be too difficult. I'm also hoping it causes me to call people I miss because I'm not longer on facebook. I want to rekindle real connections with some of the people of my past.
4--This one is booked. New Zealand in March. I originally made this a "before I turn 30" goal, which coincidentally fits right along with my 2014 desires...since I turn 30 at the end of 2014.
5--Attending the temple monthly has been a desire/goal of mine for so long now, but I'm starting to really give it the effort it's deserved from me since being endowed. I haven't missed a month for the past few months, and I think I can keep it up. If I do miss a month or two in 2014, I know I'll at least improve vastly from my past track record. And that is thanks to the angels God is surrounding me with right now.
6--This one...I'm not making any promises to myself about. I JUST started thinking about this...as in, TODAY was the first day I even allowed my brain to entertain the idea. So, if anything, 2014 will at least be the year I start to mentally prepare to be a part of this type of race. BUT, who says it can't be the year I actually participate? We'll see. Ragnar is just a month after the half marathon I'll be running...so, I'm not sure how hard I want to push my body in that type of way. While I love running, I don't necessarily believe it's the best source of constant exercise. It's like having a giant lift me up and continually slam me to the ground over and over and over again. BUT, I enjoy it and there are benefits. And I feel extremely accomplished when I'm finished with a race.
7--I'm just really into learning about real things and real people's life experiences. This should be a simple one to achieve.
8--I've dabbled in nonprofits in the past. I'm on the waiting list for a program right now. But, I really want to get my hands dirty and lose my heart and soul in a good cause. This may be one of the hardest ones to turn into reality, but if I'm serious about returning to school in a specific field (that I'll talk about at a later time), I really need to start consistently volunteering.
So, there you have it. Bring on 2014! Bring on the last year in my 20s! Bring on life!
Something about it was making me tired. It's overwhelming. I'm tired of viewing things everyone wants everyone to see. I'm also tired of the fact that I truly believe it's ruining sincere communication. I feel like people don't call me/answer my calls because they already know what's going on in my life through Facebook.... It's much easier to hide behind a screen and say mean and/or nice things to people. I'm just tired of the half-hearted, passive way of giving people approval or rejection. And...I'm also tired of texting being people's main form of communication. I'm guilty of it. But I'm tired of it.
So, quitting Facebook for a little while leads me into.....
2014 DESIRES
1) To run a half marathon
2) To stay off Facebook for at least a month
3) To call someone I love once a week (and not just the same person every week)
4) To travel outside of the country (not a 'walk across the boarder' type of thing)
5) To attend the temple monthly
6) To ***POSSIBLY*** run Ragnar (something akin to "Hood to Coast" for those of you familiar with that)
7) To read 5 biographies/creative nonfiction books
8) To find a nonprofit at which I can volunteer and stick with it consistently for at least 4 months out of the year
I think all these desires are worthy of becoming reality.
1--I've already got picked out. I haven't signed up yet, because I've been subjecting myself to staying on a very tight budget due to a forthcoming trip I'm taking, but I will sign up in the next month or two.
2--I've started the Facebook one. Maybe I'll knock this one out this first month of the year. :)
3--I'm hoping this one won't be too difficult. I'm also hoping it causes me to call people I miss because I'm not longer on facebook. I want to rekindle real connections with some of the people of my past.
4--This one is booked. New Zealand in March. I originally made this a "before I turn 30" goal, which coincidentally fits right along with my 2014 desires...since I turn 30 at the end of 2014.
5--Attending the temple monthly has been a desire/goal of mine for so long now, but I'm starting to really give it the effort it's deserved from me since being endowed. I haven't missed a month for the past few months, and I think I can keep it up. If I do miss a month or two in 2014, I know I'll at least improve vastly from my past track record. And that is thanks to the angels God is surrounding me with right now.
6--This one...I'm not making any promises to myself about. I JUST started thinking about this...as in, TODAY was the first day I even allowed my brain to entertain the idea. So, if anything, 2014 will at least be the year I start to mentally prepare to be a part of this type of race. BUT, who says it can't be the year I actually participate? We'll see. Ragnar is just a month after the half marathon I'll be running...so, I'm not sure how hard I want to push my body in that type of way. While I love running, I don't necessarily believe it's the best source of constant exercise. It's like having a giant lift me up and continually slam me to the ground over and over and over again. BUT, I enjoy it and there are benefits. And I feel extremely accomplished when I'm finished with a race.
7--I'm just really into learning about real things and real people's life experiences. This should be a simple one to achieve.
8--I've dabbled in nonprofits in the past. I'm on the waiting list for a program right now. But, I really want to get my hands dirty and lose my heart and soul in a good cause. This may be one of the hardest ones to turn into reality, but if I'm serious about returning to school in a specific field (that I'll talk about at a later time), I really need to start consistently volunteering.
So, there you have it. Bring on 2014! Bring on the last year in my 20s! Bring on life!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
