I am not depressed

I am, however, discouraged.

The job search ain't goin' well. Well, it ain't goin' the way I would like it to go.

It's easy to say you trust God's plan when it's a month prior to actually moving into an unknown situation. And then the gap in time closes, and all the sudden you realize the reality of life might slap you in the face in the near future.

Hahaha...this is the story of my life, isn't it?

Sometimes, I think I should just join a cruise ship as the deck-hand and I'll get meals, a nice little bunk...and a consistent pay-check.

What I need to be thankful for in all of this unknown is this: I am not depressed. This is a big thing for me. I often find myself in a depressed state. But right now, I am not depressed.While there is fear gnawing at my stomach, I still have this peaceful feeling at the same time....weird, I know.

And, in all reality...I AM LIVING MY LIFE RIGHT NOW. So, even thought I FEEL like it's taking me forever to get my life started...I'm actually living it. It started 27 1/2 years ago. And I'm enjoying the journey.

I will not end up on the streets.




I hope. ;)